Tuesday, May 31, 2011

alone is alright.

I was sitting alone in three rows seat. Five minutes of waiting and I've been wondering whose a person gonna seat beside me. There she is, a middle age Chinese woman. She's so pretty in her age and wait, she was holding her husband's hand firmly. Oh, I wish I was holding my husband hand too. We seat there for two hours journey. She was asking me, are you alone? And i said yes. Her grimaced resembles thousand meanings. Then she asked, don't you feel scare boarding on airplane alone? And I said No. She asked, are you often alone? And I replied Yes. She is very nice and I really wanna meet you again aunt. The reason why I'm always alone is because i don't have to think about anything and whatnot. It's good to be alone sometime.

Saturday, May 28, 2011


Can I be excused for the rest of my life? I've been watching the same drama, plots and ending. Factoid.

Sunday, May 22, 2011


Why it took so long to feel alright? The scars are here and they won't fade away. It's easier to forgive rather than forgotten.

Friday, May 20, 2011


I'm beginning to see the light. Life been good lately. Thank you Allah. Just got back from camp. The best thing that i couldn't forget is when i was lying down on sand and watching gazillion of shining stars on sky. It was four in the morning. The rhythm of sea, the winds and the sand make me appreciate on everything i have right now. Eyes to see, Ears to listen, Mouth to talk and so on. Now, I'm home. Four months of holiday just started. I just wanna go to that beach again.

Friday, May 13, 2011


It's kinda weird because i just gave my number to anon on twitter. Plus, i added him on Facebook. I haven't done this before and why on earth i've been acting like this. There is no backspace button in life dictionary. Think i should follow the flow.

Friday, May 6, 2011


Fine. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK! today is not my day and statistic paper likes asshole. FUCK YOU STATISTIC. We'll meet next semester and I'm pretty sure about that. FUCK FUCK FUCK.



I should be happy tonight cause tomorrow is my last paper. But I'm not that happy as this paper is such a killer. I did fail one paper last semester and i wish i don't repeat the same history. Too much to worry about and i forgot that i haven't eaten anything yet since last two days. And those nescafes and coke are my bestfriend at this moment. Mom will mad if she knows. Tonight, i feel so lose. I don't know what happen to me but everything is so miserable. It could be the SSF1093 paper and trust me, this is my first time studying and crying at the same time. What the jerkoff, yet i don't like this feeling. I feel like I'm gonna re-seat for this paper. *CROSS-FINGERS. Dear God, help me. Please. I don't wanna stay here for a longer period. Too much unexpected things happened today and I'm so jaded.

Thursday, May 5, 2011


Tomorrow is SSF 1083 paper. It's all about penis, vagina, man, woman, transvestite, poverty and bla bla bla. This is one of my favorite subjects but fuck the carry mark's given. Too lowest among the lowest i guess.  I reckon I'm writing more about my theories rather than dead-men theories. Fuck theory at this moment. Next paper is such a killer, SSF 1093 which is STATISTIC. What the actual fuck. Calculator is my best friend starting tomorrow. Gimme some light, and please don't bedazzling me with the super-duper difficult questions. I can't endure this alone unless Dr. Goy sitting besides me. Fuck calculation fuck numbers fuck mathematicians. After 1093, then i can breath like normal people, like normal me. Oh damn, i just can't wait for the penis paper but fuck the statistic. Too much fuck i guess, enough.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011


Saying goodbye is the hardest thing. But we will meet again okay. This is the longest goodbye I guess.
Two more papers then I'll absofreakinglutely joining you.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011


 Eight papers. Five down. Three more to go.
Counting days, hours, minutes and seconds.
 Three days left before I'll see the real-world.
Fuckload this mind with whole bunch of theories.
Undoubtedly, asylum is the best place for mental illness.
Okay enough. Back to mug up. Student life sucks when it's on exam-season, but its getting more suck when you've got no money. Trust me.

Sunday, May 1, 2011


Too many funny things came out of the closet recently and one of the best when strangers poked you. Way too many to describe each of them. The most obvious is when an anon from Twitter started calling you angel. Oh my god, am I your angel or do you mean another angle of angel? Seriously man, I'm not on the Tweet tweet to entertain you. Its the best place for me to express how I feel about certain things. It's my twitter, I entered my own email and my password, so let me decide what should I wrote, okay? And what's the hell with the angel? Oh come on, please don't be such dramatic because I'm about to hurl when you call me like that. Stop acting like you know everything about me because the truth is, I'm the one who should know everything about you. Remember, I'm your angel. The most unacceptable thing is whenever you message me and I refused to reply, then you act like a stray dog looking for foods. Get a life dude. Ketiak-lu-busuk-ingat-sikit-okay! Think I should face the comeuppance. Block or remove?
Seriously you need a sedative to ease off. Don't you have another thing to do? Why don't you be like them. Live to eat. Power-madness. Magician-Salem. They far worth for me! Ain't you, you smelly armpit! 
 From the left: Mother-power-madness and Not-Sabrina-but-Salem.
*Please don't get mad. I love you guys <3*